10/13-10/19/14

<活在愛中>10/13-10/19/14

 

「凡事包容,凡事相信,凡事盼望,凡事忍耐。 愛是永不止息。」(哥林多前書13:7-8)

 “Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance. But love will last forever…”     (1Corinthians 13: 7-8)

 

默想禱告: 上周末參加擁有「愛情博士」美譽之黃維仁博士「活在愛中的祕訣」在 紐約「角聲福音廣場」一天的講座, 主辦同工意猶未盡, 到晚間謝客宴上, 我們九對夫婦又抓緊機會, 學習操練, 將白天整日的課程濃縮成15分鐘的行 動演繹, 餐館的包廂內一時情話滿天飛, 馨馨我我, 你儂我儂, 每對夫妻把平常難以啟齒, 藏於心裡的深情厚意如花吐蕊般全然奔放, 向對方傾 訴, 頓時感覺一股濃郁芬芳之氣在席間四處飄逸。

 

 

黃維仁博士在西北大學任教多年, 桃李滿天下, 屬芝加哥名牌「土產」。而我這個38年的芝加哥「土包子」竟然在紐約異鄉才頭一次品嘗到黃博士親手烹調的「愛筵」, 因此只好狼吞虎嚥, 把「活在愛中的祕訣」的精美食譜逐字逐句抄下, 唯恐遺漏了一些重要的配料成份,其中有:

·       人生的悲劇莫過於自己在人潮中感覺最孤寂, 想去愛但偏偏愛不出來, 生命最脆弱的時候卻没有人扶上一把。

·       沒有智慧的愛會給人造成傷害, 學習先處理自己的情緒才有智慧去幫助别人。

·       人生最寶貴的禮物是「親」情, 人需要與其他人建立有意義的連結, 「把心剖露」, 把防衛放下, 避免機械化的人際關係。

·       越「親」的關係越容易破裂, 關鍵是懂得如何「修復」。

·       最徹底的心靈醫治來自愛的學習, 然後把學習到的內容服侍別人。

·       不要輕易給別人劃上等號, 先從自己開始, 省察自己的觀點和角度, 同時要努力看到別人的善意和長處。

單是研習以上的素材原料, 我現在才明白以往照自己「心靈食譜」炒出來的菜為甚麼會那麼難吃!

 

 

於是我們每對夫婦按黃博士的配料現場泡製一道「小菜」; 把生命中幾件重大的經歷互相向對方表明心中感激之情, 將客觀的情景以主觀的圖像語言把內心的需要向對方表達自己最深的感受。

 

 

我把中風經歷-妻子在床邊為我懇切禱告,輕輕在耳旁說: 「無論結果如何我會照顧你」這句使我重拾信心的貼心話向她發出由衷感謝; 從妻子帶著涙光的眼神, 我意識到她嘗到菜的原味!

 

 

求主祝福黃博士「親密之旅」整體的訓練課程,讓神完全的愛能具體地落實在世界上每個人的心中, 讓世人活出一個有目標有意義的人生, 奉主耶穌聖名禱告, 阿們。(陳熾弟兄分享)

 

Meditation & Prayer: Attending a full day workshop conducted by a very popular Clinical Psychologist Professor Huang Wei Ren, was a rare treat.

 

Teaching at Northwestern University, Dr. Huang is called “Dr. Love” by his graduate students and faculty, as signified by his deep commitment to build a genuine, loving relationship with everyone whom he encounters, the kind of relationship that may only appear on text book these days.

 

 

As I feverishly scribbled every sentence he spoke, I couldn’t help but attempting to connect all the vital ingredients of learning to love and expressing love, as though I was writing down a “Love Recipe”. Some of the ingredients are quite unfamiliar:

·       It is life’s greatest tragedy that one feels utterly lonely in the midst of a stream of people; wants to love but cannot act it out; and in the weakest moment, one cannot find a helping hand.

·       Love without wisdom could even cause more harm than good. Learn to sort out our own unresolved emotional issues before offering any advice to others.

·       The greatest gift in life is to experience “Qin”, a Chinese term for human intimacy manifested among family, friends and social relationships. Life is a school; love is the lesson. Avoid mechanical relationships that emphasize on ritualistic and superficial interactions.

·       The closer and deeper the relationship is, the more fragile it becomes. The key is to learn how to restore this broken relationship.

·       The ultimate healing comes from practice of love. Apply all the practices of love toward other people with a serving attitude.

·       Never draw simple conclusions with negative labeling on people; but rather seeing others’ positive traits and strengths.

As I examine all these powerful ingredients, I realize that my previous recipe for fostering a healthy inter-personal relationship was not exactly coming out from the right kind of cook book.

 

 

I was enlightened and reminded to “empty emotional trash” by learning to manage differences and conflicts with other people; to intentionally “strengthening relationships” by depositing more loving actions; and eventually “nurturing a health true self”.

 

 

It was truly a blessing that Dr. Huang is capable of internalizing God’s love language and teaches us how to actualize his wonderful love in our daily lives. May his “Loving Journey” curriculum brings God’s healing upon many broken relationships among Chinese families in our contemporary Chinese society, in Jesus holy name I pray, amen. (Brother Mike Chan sharing)  

 

 

王倚真、楊靜姝、陈炽 榮神传播協會 

Majesty Multimedia Ministries www.mmm4him.org

 

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