「同樣,丈夫和妻子生活在一起時,要體貼她們;尊重她們,因為她們在性別上比你們軟弱。但是,上帝賜給你們妻子的恩典與他賜給你們的是一樣的,這恩典賜予了真正的生命。這麼做,你們的禱告就不會被拒絕了。」  (彼得前書3:7)

“The same goes for you husbands: Be good husbands to your wives. Honor them, delight in them. As women they lack some of your advantages. But in the new life of God’s grace, you’re equals. Treat your wives, then, as equals so your prayers don’t run aground.”  (I Peter 3:7

默 想禱告:十月一日美國政府鬧政治炒作,上下議院两個政黨兄弟鬩牆,各不相讓,全國人民像觀看两個頑劣的兄弟在泥巴中互相拉扯打滾,打得彼此臉青鼻腫還不肯 罷休,终於宣告整個政府「關閉」Shutdown,有八十多萬公務員被迫「放準假」On_Furlough。移民局則例外,因為移民局經費不由國會撥款, 全靠從移民申請費中支取,稱為「用户費」UserFee。繁忙的審核個案中我凝神閱讀一封美國公民寄來的信。字裡行間,這位公民帶著訴苦的語氣說:「本人 跟海外一位女仕去年結婚,I130已經批出。經過一段相處後,發現此人居心叵測,彼此性格南轅北轍,語言文化均有隔閡…因此我決定放棄繼續辦理她移民美 國。」再打開擋案盤查底細,才知道這位白人公民已經結婚二次,這回是第三度再婚,結局還是一樣的失望挫敗。經年累月地審閱或直接面談中,我看過無數張光彩 奪目的婚禮照,一對對新人在鏡頭前展露出燦爛的笑容,打扮得花枝招展;約談時两人的肢體語言呈如胶似漆狀,親吻頻頻,然而這種跨張的濫情動作反而引起我額 外的注意。其實很多對幽雅的倩影,濃情密意的交織背後,很可能隱藏著虛假、詐騙、演戲的成份。倘若能探入照片中一副副喜樂洋洋的儀容,揭開華麗婚紗禮服底 表層,我會驚訝內中竟然是如斯冷漠蒼白,夫妻两人的心靈世界原來是隔著一度深深難以跨越的鸿溝。因此單憑結婚文件,銀行户口,共同資產來証明每段婚姻的真 偽性幾乎是不可能的事,但往往只需經過幾年歲月,甚至更短的時間,申請人的夫妻關係能否維持下去就會原形畢露。我處理過不少騙婚、假結婚、離婚、重婚、同 性婚、婚外情、結婚卻從沒有過夫婦生活、暴力家庭、性虐待…等案例, 得到的綜合結論是: 方便式婚姻」MarriageofConvenience,「功利式婚姻」「有條件性婚姻」結局都是一樣:激 情喜劇化的開始,冷酷悲劇化的結束。”從屬靈的眼光看,衹要人生命中的罪性未被對付,罪未得赦免,叛逆自我為中心的本質未被更新翻轉,一切人際關係,包括 夫妻,子女,鄰舍…生活上的各方各面就必然會充斥著紛爭、嫉妒、怨懟、苦毒、仇恨、鬥爭…等敵對現象。美國主流社會離婚率早已超過百份之五十,黑人族裔高 達百份之七十是「單身家庭」,有如「母系族群」。這種普遍脆弱的家庭結構,夫妻關係破裂的光景不斷搖撼著健全社會的根基,若不及時回轉,社會不大亂才怪。 達拉斯神學院教授艾維斯Tony Evans指出建立基督化家庭乃是復興殘缺婚姻的良方,他呼籲每位男性基督徒,好好做一個「國度的屬靈人」Kingdom Man, 遵從聖經教訓做一個好丈夫, 並强調說: 社會因缺乏 “國度的屬靈人” 而導致家庭關係的拆毀, 痛苦,煎熬,最终成為社會禍害之源。Kingdom Man Teaching  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x--48OQ07pM 聽這位黑裔屬靈領袖,批判黑人族群因家庭倫理的崩潰所造成各種社會危害真是擲地有聲, 當 頭棒喝。聖經所設定的家庭模式乃是人類家庭普遍性的準則,不分族種與文化,信徒與非信徒均可適用。分別在於基督徒若遵守主道和教訓,家庭必然蒙受莫大的祝 福,夫妻關係和諧,彼此體貼尊重,子女也以此倣效,建立健全的人格。而非信徒家庭若僅僅依照俗世標準而行,必然走上瞎子領瞎子的步伐, 結果是婚姻破裂, 或是關係有名無實, 兒女疏離, 令自己感到終身遺憾。求主幫助,使每個基督徒都願意順從聖靈带領,建立以基督為首的家庭,否則我們也嚐不到豐碩的果實,反而成了不信者的笑柄,成了現代的法利賽人。祷告祈求奉主耶穌聖名,阿們。(陳熾弟兄分享)*請繼續為10/23日伊州反同性婚合法化大遊行代祷。若願意参加, 請在此網站上報名 marriage1m1w.org

Meditation & Prayer: Apparently I have not felt the devastating effect of the government shutdown yet. I am still working, because our agency’s operational funds come from all types of immigration applications called the “User Fees”. In the mist of reviewing family petitions, a letter strikes me with an interesting request. It says: “Dear Sir, I would request an immediate termination of the petition process. Our marriage is not working out. We have irreconcilable differences and now I am not sure about her motive to marry me in the first place. Our cultural and language gap is unbridgeable….after living together for a few months.” Digging deeper into the case history, I found this petitioner had married twice, and this is his 3rd time, which of course quickly disintegrates into oblivion. A lot of times, we never know hiding behind the façade of gorgeous wedding pictures, intimate body language during interviews, can in fact substantiate a genuine marital relationship or simply the couple is using a fictitious ploy to circumvent the laws. Common assets and liabilities, bills and joint accounts do not by itself proof the bona-fides of a marriage. I have adjudicated petitions and applications based on family relations turned out to be fraudulent, scams, marriage of domestic violence, sexual abuse…etc. This leads me to believe marriage based on convenience, passion, and transaction never lasts long, a few years top. More than 50% of American families end in divorce within 5 years of marriage, and 70+% single mother households in the African American community affirms my hypothesis. Pastor Tony Evans attributes this pervasive problem to the breakdown of traditional family values, and the only way to get out of this mess is to restore and resume our spiritual leadership in the family, especially among men. He calls it “A Kingdom Man”  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x--48OQ07pM Christian families are not immune from this kind of chaos and breakup, if we choose not to adopt God’s model to nourish our marital relationship and to raise our children according to the biblical principles. We see more and more families fall prey to secular values, New Age thinking, and other progressive views, which pull us further away from fostering a healthy family life. If the product is broken, one should go back to the manufacturer for repair. Marriage is a sacred institution established by God, and thus we must go back to this designer when the mechanics are out of whack due to our misuse or even abuse. It is amazing to see my job continues to provide me with virtual scenarios as illustrations to affirm my Christian faith, through which I am reminded and taught to honor and respect God’s institution of marriage. Glory is His name, in Jesus holy name I give thanks, amen. (Brother Mike Chan sharing-Please pray for the upcoming Springfield rally on 10/23rd. For further information, visit marriage1m1w.org)


王倚真、楊靜姝、陈炽 榮神传播協會

Majesty Multimedia Ministries www.mmm4him.org

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